Creating Happiness

Have you ever found yourself wondering when you became so miserable? It seemed to have crept in slowly, bit by bit somewhere along the way and now you’re in a rut and not really sure how you got there? Whilst it’s easy to think you’re so far away from feeling good again, it really only needs to take a few small changes, and an internal decision, to get yourself feeling on top of the world again!

One of the first suggestions I have for creating happiness, is to create some space. Now by that I don’t necessarily mean physically, although clearing out the clutter in your home is a GREAT way to start feeling good again. ‘Stuff’ has the tendency to weigh us down energetically and it will be very freeing to clear out anything you don’t need anymore – you’ll feel so much lighter for doing it.

What I really mean by making space however, isn’t specific to any area of your life, it’s wherever you most need it. The first place I would start is to make some space in your schedule for you. Take at least 20 minutes each day, even if it means waking up a little earlier, to start your day honouring yourself. Whether you use that time to write in a journal, listen to your favourite music, go for a walk in the fresh air, meditate or just enjoy some quiet time, savour it as your special gift to yourself.

Another way to create space is in your friendships. Who are you spending the most time with and what impact are they having on your life? If you find yourself being negative, consider if the people around you are feeding that negativity… if so, you may want to consider whether spending this much time with them is healthy? Alternatively, maybe it’s something you could discuss with them and agree to start pulling each other up and being more positive. You’d be surprised how much easier it is to make these changes if you’re both aware and looking out for each other.

Finally, I would say that the most powerful way to make yourself happy is to DECIDE to be happy. I know that sounds easier said than done, but we have so much more power than we choose to believe we have and at the end of the day it’s only us who decides how we will feel. Don’t let life choose your moods for you – how you choose to react to any situation is entirely within your control. Empower yourself with the knowledge that it’s up to you ALWAYS to decide what mood you’re in.

So be the guardian of your thoughts and CHOOSE HAPPINESS. It’s a habit like any other.

In Need of Psychological Plumbing - I'm Blocked!

By Sabrina Holmes

How often do you feel like you’re doing everything you can in a particular area of your life and yet you don’t seem to have any ‘wins’? You feel like knocking your head against a wall don’t you? I know I do! Even if you’re the kind of person who is committed to constant personal growth and change, those days come. Sometimes I feel like I know so much about something there can’t possibly be a reason for not achieving exactly what I want... and yet I don’t... it’s inconceivable! I’ve found myself yelling, crying, punching, getting depressed and watching TV and sometimes even lashing out at the spiritual world because of the senselessness of it all!

What’s the block? What causes the flow of energy to literally block up? Well... let me see if I can shed some light. I’m a big believer in alignment within oneself. I believe that a part of our journey here is to find that sense of peace that comes with aligning the body, mind and soul and it’s an ongoing journey that doesn’t seem to have it’s destination in one singular lifetime. Sometimes our blockages are unconscious which puts us out of alignment because we’re not able to see them so clearly, short of getting yourself a coach (which I can HIGHLY recommend), let me share with you one of my favourite self coaching tools – the power of an open ended question. Whenever I’m having these moments of questioning and frustration that’s when I sit down with my journal and get very honest with myself. I begin to explore my thoughts on whatever the topic of my frustration is and I get very confronting with myself about what I’m believing, what I’m telling myself and then I ask the big one: “Am I really doing EVERYTHING I can or can I do more, can I do something different?”. Inevitably the answer is no, I’m not doing EVERYTHING I can and, yes I can do more. By asking myself the right question, my unconscious mind goes searching for the answers I need.

For example, just this week I was wondering why my phone wasn’t running hot with new business and I started getting down on myself, I started pushing blame outward until I woke up to my pointless behaviour and decided to look for a solution instead. I picked up my journal and simply wrote this question: “What more can I do, specifically, to generate new business?” and the pen started flowing. I made a list of six things I knew I should be doing but hadn’t for some time, I’d simply gotten sidetracked, they’d dropped off my radar. They were simple things that I put back into my schedule immediately. I guess it’s a little bit of a self-generated wake up call. I think these are the best kind because if you don’t do it... believe me the Universe will find a way to do it for you and usually it’s not as gentle as you are on yourself. Step up and live consciously.

New Beginnings

Greetings fabulous women!

Well a new year inevitably brings the excitement of new beginnings, and here at Glow we're no exception. Our very own Life Coach extraordinaire, Sabrina Holmes, is preparing to welcome the birth of her first baby (still affectionately known as 'Peanut') to the world, which is very exciting.

The joy of new babies is that they come into the world with no pre-conceptions about how things 'should' or 'shouldn't' be. They have no judgments, no concerns, no worries and, as they grow into walking, talking children, they develop a boundless curiosity about all that is possible.

Children approach life with a beautiful and pure sense of 'anything is possible' because they haven't yet learned that it isn't. That's a clue for the rest of us, because how many things have we 'learned' that have created imaginary boundaries for us that ultimately restrict our growth? "Oh no, I can't do that, it would be socially irresponsible", or "No, that's not possible because I don't have the (time, money, skills...)".

With the new year upon us, take a few minutes to establish what imaginary boundaries you've placed upon yourself that are undoubtedly restricting your growth, and not allowing you to be the person you are aching inside to be.

This month we encourage you to approach your life with childlike curiosity and enthusiasm... try looking at your situations through the eyes of a child. Have no boundaries, question everything, and don't always assume that you know something is wrong or right for you.

Tis the season to be jolly...

This is just a quick note to say a very...

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

As an Australian, I've always had Christmas in the intense heat of Summer, so this year, while living in the USA, I begged my husband to take me somewhere cold so we could have a white Christmas.

So today's blog entry is coming to you from Montreal, Canada, where it's freezing cold, and fabulously white!

Wherever you're enjoying this festive day, I hope you're with people you love, and enjoying every moment of it.

Ho ho ho

Katrina xoxox

Self Esteem for Women - Don't Settle for Mr 'Not Bad'

For any woman who’s ever been out there, navigating her way through the dating game (yep – that’s most of us!), it can be challenging to decipher what’s really ‘right’ and what’s not.

For a start, in the first months of any relationship, you’re both so caught up in the ‘honeymoon’ period that you are often simply blind to any flaws the relationship, or the person you’re dating, may have. Generally, over time, as the romantic haze settles into something more real, both partners will probably start to notice the more negative side of the mate they previously thought was so perfect. In a healthy relationship, these human flaws are recognized and accepted for what they are, or if they are unacceptable to either party, they may choose to part ways.

Unfortunately I’ve seen too many women who reach a point where they are so keen to settle into the domestic bliss of a relationship, that they start lowering their standards and finding ways to justify these sub-standards to themselves. “I was being too picky anyway”, “I’m not perfect either” or “I have to be more open to people’s faults”. Whilst these statements may also be true, if they are used as a means to settle for less, or justify decisions you know deep down aren’t right, then they are only causing harm, not good.

Have you ever noticed how easy it is to justify ANY decision you really want to make? For instance, you know you shouldn’t buy that gorgeous dress that costs about a month’s rent, yet you’ve fallen so much in love and you simply “have to have it”. You start telling yourself that you really don’t have any other good red glittery dresses, and that it really is an essential part of your wardrobe (I mean, what wardrobe is complete without one?!!). You tell yourself that you’ve had a really bad week, so you deserve this dress… You’re a good person, why shouldn’t you treat yourself?! Before you know it your credit card is being swiped through a machine and that dress is in a bag, walking out the door.

We’ve all come home with an impulsive item or two in our time, but a dress is one thing… doing the same with a relationship could cost you years of your life that could otherwise have been spent blissfully happy, with someone who still makes you weak at the knees, year after year.

As tempting as it can be sometimes to convince yourself that the guy you’re dating with the lousy attitude, bad temper and belching problem can be your Mr Right, don’t settle… be happy with you first, on your own and the real Mr Right won’t help but be drawn to your strong sense of self worth and independence.

The Spiral of Life

It is broadly accepted that we, as human beings, can consolidate most of our experiences in life to three areas of priority: relationships, finance/career and health. Too often we’re told to find ‘balance’ between the three, but it just doesn’t work that way. Usually when one of these areas is going great guns, another area is lagging a little. This is perfectly normal and healthy and part of life’s perfect cycle. At different times during our life we focus on one of these three areas more than the other two. The trick is to not tip the scales so far that you do damage to one area while you’re madly improving the other e.g. throwing everything you have into work and leaving your loved ones wondering what you look like, or bending over backward for everyone in your life to the detriment of your health (yes moms this one is aimed at you).

Life is like an upward spiralling coil, the idea is to continue improving each area of our life so that the ‘bad’ times of each new phase are still better than the ‘good times’ of the phase before. Sometimes we drive forward madly and then it’s time for quietness, integration and just ‘being’. Learn to understand this process and work with it and you’ll begin to be much kinder to yourself. Which area are you focusing on right now and are you happy with how you’re maintaining the other two?

By Sabrina Holmes

The Power of a Good Pair of Shoes

You’re having the day from hell… your kids are sick, your husband is away, work is busier than ever, you just found out your mother-in-law is coming to town and you were on hold with the telephone company for 45 minutes before they accidentally cut you off. Sound familiar?

Any fashion loving woman knows that good old retail therapy can cure the most miserable of days, but shopping for clothing has its limitations… what if you’re having a ‘fat day’? You know the one… no-one else can see a shred of difference, because to the naked eye you look exactly the same as every other day, but you feel like you must have somehow gained 20 pounds overnight. (Of course, this could just as easily be followed by a ‘skinny day’ where you’re wondering why no-one else can tell how much weight you must have dropped since yesterday, but that’s another story…)

There’s really only one cure for these days, and that’s a fantastic pair of shoes! Whether you’re keen to shop for a new pair, or to bring out the favorites from your wardrobe, a good pair of shoes can do wonders for lifting the spirit. They can add pizzazz to the most basic of outfits, and have you walking down the street like you’re on a catwalk.

If you don’t already own a pair of shoes like this, give yourself a special gift and go shopping for them. They’re not your average, comfortable, practical, go-with-anything shoes. These are the pair that you might look at longingly in the window, but decide that they’re a little too wild for you or that you don’t have anything to wear with them. That’s the magic pair you need to own!

When I need a pick me up, I wear a basic black dress, and throw on my 4” red patent leather pumps, because they always make me feel like a million dollars, regardless of how my body may be feeling. The best part is, because I’m radiating so much positivity and self esteem, people ALWAYS notice. I get compliments all the time when I’m wearing these beautiful shoes, and whilst they are definitely fabulous, I believe its moreso because I’m walking with such confidence. If I was walking down the street with my head down and my shoulders forward, I’m certain they wouldn’t have this effect.

So next time you’re having one of ‘those’ days, get out your favorite pair of shoes, and strut down the street with your hips swinging and your head held high… I guarantee you won’t be able to help but to feel great!